William Manchee

Novelist

I Wish I’d Had Bad Credit
 

You gotta have good credit

Or so my mama, said

Pay your bills on time

And life will be sublime
 

With good credit you can buy

A house, a car, a diamond ring

Get them now, no money down

Then celebrate all over town
 

Being an obedient child

I took my mama’s advice

And bought all those things

In fact, I got two diamond rings
 

Then my brother’s business stumbled

Hey sis, you’ve got such good credit,

Would you please, please co-sign my loan?

Ohhh, I cringed, stifling a mournful groan.
 

My banker said no problem,

Your credit is so good

We’ll give your brother his credit line

Right here is where you sign.
 

Now the economy has crumbled

By brother’s fled, his business failed

So, guess who makes his payment now?

"Little me," I say bitterly and bow
 

But, since I have good credit

I can still borrow to make ends meet

And credit cards are so easy to acquire

I can get as many as I desire
 

This works quite nicely for awhile

I borrow from Visa to pay the bank

But then my credit score begins to sink

With so much debt, I’m no longer in the pink

 

I’ve got a job, my husband works

But now our cash flow sucks

We have to cut our lifestyle back

My husband gives me lots of flack
 

We argue now all the time

How did you get us so far in debt?

It was just so easy to borrow

Buy today and pay tomorrow
 

I guess it’s bankruptcy court for us
There’s really no other way out

And once our debts are forgiven

Then we can get back to livin’
 

‘Cause we don’t need good credit

We’ll buy only what we can afford

Believe me, good credit is deadly trap

If anyone says different they’re full of crap